[Transcript starts at 0:40]
Hello, hello, hello, my podcast people and thank you for joining me for yet another episode of my favorite online business podcast. If you're listening, if you are tuning in, if you are watching on the day that this drops, it is Monday, September 21st. Welcome to the back half of September.
So today I'm going to lean into the dopeness that is having my own podcast and I'm going to talk about something that is not 100% online business related. We'll see if I tie it in like probably not really that much and that's cool because it's my podcast. So what are we talking about? Gender roles.
So I tend to use my platform, especially my email, to talk about things that are important to me and to impart lessons that I think might be helpful. And the other day a topic popped into my head just like that as something that I wanted to riff on and give some more air time. So here we go, here we are and that topic again is gender roles.
So I think I've said it before but I think, I mean, I know I said it before. A podcast is a really fun place in my opinion for working through ideas, especially for me. It's easiest for me to talk about things, talk through things and then I have the outline that I make which also helps me process these things.
I'm never just like off the cuff. I have written an entire outline first which really helps me just organize my thoughts with things. So I will always sing the praises of a podcast.
Yes, from an online business perspective, it is great for deepening relationships but it is so, so, so good for processing your own thoughts and your ideas and organizing your thoughts and ideas and working through your thoughts and ideas and then sharing them in a way that's more digestible for your people. So quick plug because this is my podcast. If you are wanting to start a podcast and you want help starting one, I got the interest list up for round four of my podcast program, Press Publish.
Eight weeks, you will have a podcast but I'm waiting until I get enough names on there to launch it, to run that fourth round. So ideally, four to five people would be great and yeah, maybe folks are like, what? You don't have four to five people? No, because not everyone wants to start a podcast but four to five people would be great for the round. So if you're interested, I'd love to run it.
I'm looking at the calendar. I'd love to run it in October or November. Oh, hit the bowl.
October November. So I'll put that link in the show notes. Thank you, Courtney.
Thank you, Jojo. Add your name to the list or send me a message as well. Let me know that you're interested and we can get that thing, get that thing going.
So main topic today, gender roles and I want to share my thoughts on it because it is a topic that I do see getting shared, getting some air time on the socials. It's not the only thing that I see because like I very much do curate my experience and I don't follow a lot of that shit but I do see it, namely from fucking Scott Galloway. If you don't know who that is, that's fine and he's getting so close but still fucking missing the point.
You know, the midterms are coming up which we have all the propaganda going. You know, we're in a very politically charged environment, very politically charged time. Trump, fuck that guy now always and forever and he is, you know, continues to run things into the ground more so than they were before and his poor leadership is perpetuating a culture of avoiding responsibility and instead pointing the finger.
Translation, fuck the manosphere. If you don't know what the manosphere is consider yourself lucky but also go look it up especially if you have sons or you interact with men. Netflix actually did a pretty decent documentary on it so go check that out.
I stay on socials and so I see things and then I go and look things up and I will from time to time go on Twitter and just to see what the worst of the worst are talking about and you know like the Graper movement. If you know what that is, fuck it up. But I want to share my thoughts, just hard segue there, hard transition there, but I want to share my thoughts on gender roles.
One because it's my podcast and I do what I want and two because I think I have somewhat a unique, somewhat of a unique take on things given, you know, the androgynous landscape that I have always occupied and very happily occupied, right? So the first thing I want to start off by saying which is maybe the most important thing I want to say is that the patriarchy fucks men as well, right? Patriarchy, white supremacy, capitalism all related and they will all be our downfall, right? It is my belief that you should live your life however the fuck you want to live your life, obviously without creating direct harm and doing direct harm to others, but meaning what I mean by this is that if you and your consenting partner want to live by traditional gender roles, go ahead. Fucking love that for you. Very weird behavior to me to be forcing personal beliefs and ideals onto other people.
Tacky, loser behavior, see again the manosphere. One of the biggest privileges that I've had growing up looking the way that I do, if you're listening to this and for some reason you have no idea what I look like, which is impossible because I'm on the cover of the cover art, but maybe just like go Instagram or like go watch this episode on YouTube and you could see. But one of the privileges that I've had growing up looking what I do, I've always looked like this, is that I've been privy to some extent to both male and female experiences, right? Female and male, male and female experiences.
What I mean by this is things like no one has ever told me I can't do something or that I explicitly need to do something, like have children. No one has ever said that to me, right? I will say society has tried subconsciously via racism to tell me I can't do things and that like kind of made me get in my feels with this last fucking election and I'm like y'all fucking hate black people that much? You hate women that fucking much? But my point with this being that what I have experienced has never been the same as what a human who has been raised and socialized traditionally female has experienced in terms of like you can't do this or you should do this, you're here to have kids. I don't know, I've never experienced that, right? I did not have traditional gendered expectations.
My mom has always been the fucking best, the best since minute moment number one. I love Transformers, I love Ninja Turtles. Do y'all remember Capsela sets? Maybe you don't.
Very niche, maybe. I actually texted my mom about this because I was like, mom why did you even buy this thing? I think about this Capsela set, I never remember the name, I had to google it, but I can think about the toy at least once a week. At least once a week I think about that thing.
And she was like Livingston Mall had a shop, a science store, and I was like you just like fucking went and bought this? And she was like I had to keep your brain occupied and entertained. And I was like well the best since day fucking one. I like the Rector sets, I really love that Capsela set, so I really like that thing.
I did also have Barbies and a Cabbage Patch. I think I had two Cabbage Patch dolls, but one was maybe a Kabootleg one, but one was official. His name was Nathan.
Don't remember the last name, but his name was Nathan. I hated bugs, still hate them. I don't hate them to the same extent and I will save the spiders.
I don't want to touch them, I never want to touch them. But I distinctly remember having a bug kit, like a bug catching kit, and I was like I don't want this. I don't want to tell my friend Andrew to put stuff in it.
I was like I don't like this. Worms, still hate them to this day. All that to say I liked what I liked and I didn't like what I didn't like and I believe that to be true for humans in general, right? The idea that all boys always like this or all girls always like that, that's fucking dumb.
As I'm saying it, hopefully you're sitting there being like of course that can't be true, right? Like what? I hold the same belief for how we interact with humans, other humans, and how we navigate life in general. Some people like these things and some people like those things. This is what it is, period.
Ideally if you want a partner, be it romantic, work, volleyball, you find someone who likes, enjoys, is good at, prefers, or at least doesn't hate the things that complement your own personal preferences. Example from this past weekend, Lex and I do a big house cleaning once a month. Lex does not mind cleaning the bathrooms.
I don't really like doing that. If I have to, when I lived alone, of course I'd do it, but I don't like doing that. Whereas I don't mind vacuuming, I actually enjoy it.
I'll mop the floors, I'll literally clean everything else, right? I do the bulk of the cleaning and she does the bulk of the cooking and she takes care of, when it's the big cleaning day, she takes care of the kitchen and she will do the, we have two and a half bathrooms, she'll take care of that. I will vacuum in those spaces and I will mop in those spaces, but she takes care of everything else, right? Partnership, right? I am hard-pressed to think of many things that have true biological underpinnings that would cause those things to be gendered, especially in today's society, right? We are resourced as fuck. Yes, I am aware of pregnancy and hormones and, you know, the biological underpinnings of that and why, you know, the mom may have a certain type of attachment.
Yes, my point being that anyone can do anything today. Women can acquire the most sought-after resource, money. Men can take care of the most important asset and I'm going to call it an asset, children.
Everything is possible for everyone, right? That word there, possibility, possible, it's what I want to draw your attention to. I consider myself a possibility presenter. My whole reason for even making this episode is simply to present a possibility that I know that most people are aware exists, like, even if it's just in their gut, like, they fucking, humans are smart, mostly, but I think that this possibility is not, you know, being overtly stated enough and because of that, people don't lean in.
People don't really like going first and so if no one's talking about it, they're like, ah, and so I'm here to just present possibilities. If you want to lean in, great. If you're like, nope, I want this over here, that's fine too, right? I joke around with my closest friends, especially Joe, and I often rhetorically ask, are straight people okay? Y'all okay? To which the answer is always no, right? And that question comes from me just sitting and observing heterosexual culture and by observing, I simply mean having eyes because it's everywhere all the time, so I never want to hear one fucking thing about a gay agenda or grooming or whatever other non-fucking nonsense the red hats like to spew, right? The expectations that I see surrounding heteronormativity, y'all, it just doesn't need to be the case.
It's making people miserable, miserable. I do believe, I've said it many times to my close people, that queer culture, especially Black queer culture, most specifically trans, Black trans women, it so clearly presents so many solutions to what plagues us today, right? Be yourself, lean into what fits for you, refuse the boxes, refuse to put others in boxes, get rid of the binary, right? Again, if the stereotypical, you know, traditional gender roles are what flips your pancake, amazing, lean in, love that for you. I actually have a client, I had a client, he's one of my favorites, like he knows who he is, big, big, big love for that guy, right? And that is the life that he leads, right? A more traditional gender role lifestyle, and I love that for him.
I love that for him so much. He's a very religious guy, and I love that for him. You see how happy he gets to listen to like religious music, and I'm like, great, I love this for you.
You know, I think back to when his wife was pregnant with their third kid, and we're talking on one of our calls, there'd be, our calls would be so long, I just, my biggest love for this guy, and he's pregnant with his, his wife was pregnant with their third kid, and I asked what the plan was going to be for like sleep, and like managing tasks, and like the other two kids, and you know, I was like, we just talked about stuff like that, but also like related to the business, I'm like, what kind of do to kind of plan, and he was just like, you know, we have pretty traditional roles here, and then he explained the divvying of tasks, and I was like, perfect, that's great, love this for you, right? That works for the two of them, they're happy, they communicate about it, they have great teamwork, amazing, I'm never here to be like, my way, that's fucking weird behavior, that's weird behavior, like do what works for you, love that. I personally have never wanted kids, and that resolve grows more and more each day, because we have kids surrounding us, fuck those kids, is that what I said? Love it for you, hate it for me, I would hate it for me. I have always wanted, as well as a partner, a partner that makes their own money, that they're fully set on their own, and we can just be happy together.
Of course, you know, able to hold it down if the other person is needed, support the other person is needed, absolutely, but like, each person comes in and is like, I'm a grown-ass adult, and resource adult, and like, here we are, right? I have never had a goal of retiring my partner, or anything like that, I never had a goal of like having my partner be able to stay home with kids, because I don't fucking want kids, never since, never, I've never wanted them, right? But if that is what you want, amazing, great, grand, wonderful, doesn't matter if you're a man, woman, whatever, non-binary, it doesn't matter, if that's what you want in your life, great, lean in. Again, I am just here to be the possibility presenter, and say things that I believe, and that I'm not seeing being shared very much, right? So my thoughts on gender roles, live your life, live your life, do what works for you, find a partner that creates, you know, helps you create a situation that works for both of you, love this, and then keep communicating, right? Make this one very precious life that we have, exactly what you want it to be. All right, this was a really fucking fun episode, I'm gonna do more like these, would love to hear if there's more things you want me to riff on, and share my two pennies.
You can text me, 310-737-2345, send me a DM at the moving maestro, I would love to hear from you. All right, I'm gonna wrap it up there, that was really fun. As always, endlessly, endlessly, I'm gonna say one more time, endlessly appreciative for every single one of you.
Until next time friends, maestro, out.
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